Monday, March 26, 2012


Ryan slipped off to bed early the other night, so I grabbed a blanket and spent a couple hours watching 30 Rock episodes OnDemand. I'm not an avid watcher, but the sitcom provided me with a host of mindless giggles, which totally served its purpose of keeping my thoughts on lighter things.

In one particular episode, Jenna was uber excited that her boyfriend was coming back into town. Apparently these two had a pretty hot and heavy/crazy-like relationship, and as such she was expecting a long adventurous night with her man. Turns out though, they were both so tired from their long day they ended up falling asleep before anything crazy could happen. The next day, in an effort to make falling asleep seem not so lame, they gave what happened a "kinky" new sub name: "Normaling." They spent the next few weeks doing things that only "normal" couples would do. Going to Bed Bath and Beyond, and spending hours deciding where the best place in the living room a certain chair would fit best. In the end it was realized that "Normaling" was really them transitioning into a steady, normal relationship. It wasn't this exiting cutting edge phenomenon after all...

It seems to me that this is what Ryan and I are doing right now.

We are Normaling.

We spend our days thrilling in the fact that we are doing perfectly normal things. It seems unnatural these days to go to the store and have a conversation about the succulent tastes of different kinds of oranges. It seems unnatural, but we partake anyway. Awkwardly, yet happily in what seem to be our "roles" in this episode of our life.

We are playing the part of normal.

"How are you feeling, Babe?"

"Hanging in there. How about you?"


"What would you like for lunch?"

"Oh Lucchesi's deli sounds good to me!"


"Oh, we are out of eggs."

"I'll run by the store later this afternoon."


Blogging this post right at this moment?


It all FEELS like we are reciting lines from a script.

We know how our days are supposed to play out. We know our cues, we know our lines...and we spend our days convincing each other that our performances are natural rather than scripted.

I know as we continue to play our parts, life will gradually become less awkward.

As an extension of all this normaling I feel as though I'm an understudy in my pancreatic duties as well. Changing sets, counting carbs, nighttime checks...they don't come as naturally as they used to. There's no flow.

The other day the boys ate lunch and I didn't have them check their sugar before. I know, "GASP!" I even made sure there were strips with me before we left the car to go into the restaurant. But as we sat at the table...everyone was so happy, and so talkative...I got lost in our "Normaling," and never had the boys do their checks. Which...I know...there are crazier things...

But , it just serves as a small example that we need to relearn "our normal."

No, I don't think it is a bad thing that diabetes is on the back burner keeping warm while we are feasting on normalcy. I just hope I don't faint when the leftover A1C's come looking unappetizingly warmed over in a tupperware bowl next month.

Next month seems years away though.

Right now I can only think about today.

I'll worry about tomorrow, tomorrow.

I think under the present circumstances...that is what a normal person would do.

I think.

I'm still trying to figure this whole "Normaling" thing out.


  1. Normalizing is worth more than an Oscar. (Don't tell my kid the actor as part of his nomalizing is to dream of one.)

    The real trick of course is what you allude to which is normalizing without having an adverse impact on the pancreatic outcomes, or at least not a significant one. I see getting diabetes to the back burner but still on the stove as a goal.

    Hear is to normal, long and happy lives.

  2. You guys - are fabulous! This gave me goosebumps. I pray everything will work out well. You deserve that. xx

  3. Yay for you and Ryan and... the guys!
    Your awesome life continues to inspire me.
    Big hugs!

  4. Oh, you keep normaling! And a1c's will take care of themselves. We had a higher a1c this time..but I can't stress about it. It'll be better next time. ENJOY those precious normal moments that we are praying for! Love you! : )

  5. Ahhh Meri let me know when you figure out what normaling is...I could use a lesson or two, also! Have a great week knowing that nobody has any of it figured out either. PS I still love all your pics of your guys and dog, your family is just beautiful :)

  6. Yep, in the midst of upheaval, doing normal things can seem very odd. But, they are things that have to, need to be done and there's comfort in just doing normal things. :)

  7. totally agree with Denise....finding comfort in those normal every day things is nice. Reading about your meal out with the boys and forgetting to have them check BG's first put such a lovely happy image in my head....everyone smiling around the table and just being together...normaling. love it. :o)

  8. I love how you write. it. I love that you were able to go out to lunch and have a "normal" lunch, how long has it been since you've done that? And in the scheme of things forgetting one test? Pshaw. The A1C does not define you or the type of caregiver you are to your children. I loved the previous poster who said she sees that diabetes on the backburner but still on the stove as a goal as being completely appropriate. Soak up all the normaling you can and your entire family deserves every moment of that.


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