Monday, November 9, 2009

November 6th

A little interesting fact about our family is that I gave birth to my two youngest on the same day of the year. B and L were both born on November 6th exactly two years apart. November 6th is also my father in laws birthday AND most importantly…it is also the day my husband asked me to marry him.

We were really young…I was 19 at the time and he was 21. He was my best friend and our relationship was easy. I was used to drama and guys ignoring me while we dated, but Ryan was different. He was always thoughtful. He was always kind and polite, and he only treated me with respect.

He called me at Macy’s on November 6th, 1992 and asked for me to stop by after work. I didn’t get off until 9:00 that night but he insisted. I reluctantly agreed and continued on with my day. It didn’t even faze me that my Mom and my sisters came by to say hello. (My Mom wasn’t a big mall shopper.) They had silly grins, but I was clueless. (Ryan had asked for my hand earlier from my father, and of course my father practically THREW me at him. My parents LOVE Ryan.)

His proposal was simple. He changed out of his life and bakery uniform of jean shorts and white shirt into a shirt and tie. He asked me immediately and I (obviously) said yes.

I couldn’t wait to be married to him. We would have a great life. We would be adults. We would make our own decisions. Life was going to be all smiles and adventures. We had love, what more did anyone need?

And as I look back on the past 17 years…WOW!!!!!!! has been hard. Really, really hard. With 5 pregnancies, (one that didn’t work out, and one that was especially worrisome,) and the bakery, (that he worked 15 hours a day in,) and diabetes diagnosis, (Four, if you include my brothers,) and cancer, (My husband’s mother survived breast cancer and my husband had a serious Melanoma that required chemo this year,) and everything else that life threw at us…man, it’s been REALLY REALLY hard.

But even through the pain and the stress and the uncertainty of life…love has remained. And as hard as life has been, I still have my best friend beside me. He still wears his jean shorts and white T-shirts and he still dotes over me like when we were first married. And we have 4 beautiful boys…who relish every minute of their lives…and who, because of diabetes, appreciate the little things…like brownies with M&M’s on top for their classes on Friday.

Looking back, would I change anything? Mostly I would change things about me. IF I could relive it all…I would worry less...I would take my frustration out on my husband less…I wouldn’t try so hard to be perfect…or to impress those around me. I would have accepted that my best was good enough and I probably would have let my kids have friends over in a house that was not as neat as a pin.

I would tell myself everyday…that hard times don’t last forever…that there will be good times around the corner…and that life is too precious to waste with constant worry and self loathing.

I would appreciate the little moments more…and I would appreciate all the wonderfullness that I've always had right in front of me...


  1. Beautiful Meri and so well said! November 6 is quite a day for you! Thanks for sharing!

  2. That is wonderfull Meri and wow November 6th is important to you . That is just a wonderfull date for you . God bless you and your family and you guys certainly have been through it .

  3. What a special day! And what a special post! Thanks for sharing it - and your beautiful family - with me! Hugs!!

  4. That is amazing! Thanks for sharing your stories. I am in awe of all your strength Meri...I know it is hard and you have your moments, like we all do, of feeling the weight of it all but you are doing an incredible job with your family...You should feel proud of all your accomplishments. Hope you all had a great celebration!

  5. Great post Meri! You are awesome, wonderful, and deserve great things! It sounds like your family is one great thing you have been blessed with! Enjoy the birthdays and anniversary today!

  6. WOW there must be a lot of planning that goes into you November 6 celebrations. How do you mange to celebrate all that in just one day? But hey you seem to mange sooo much everyday...amazing :) and thank you for that beautiful post.

  7. WOW!!!! Now I love November 6th too...I think this date will stick in my mind and I'll always think of you ;)

    Beautiful post...beautiful family...beautiful life!

  8. WOW! That is awesome! What an incredibly special day! You are one lucky lady despite all the craziness :)

  9. What a great post... thanks for sharing with us. Loved the advice at the end. I think I need to read this post at the start of every day!

  10. LOVE IT!! I am going to steel that ending for a quote of the day :)

  11. Just for the record I did not throw you at him. However when he ask me when he should ask you, I told him ASAP. He then said he would do it that night. The boy can follow suggestions.

  12. I remember you waking up the next morning and everyone looking at the ring. I asked Evan, "What happened?" Evan said, "Meri got engaged." Then I asked, "to who?" When he said it was Ryan I thought he was joking; You always said you guys were just friends, and I was 10 years old and beleived you. It was so much fun for me to watch your kids grow up while I was growing up. I learned a lot from you guys.


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