Saturday, July 27, 2013

Because we know better. (My reaction to the "Tiger Mom" perception.)

Last week I read this very interesting article on Diabetes Mine.  And by interesting I mean I had to try hard to keep my composure while I reading it.  Wil did a great job trying to be partial in all of this, but he kind of blew it for me when he said, “Yes, I think the new D-parenting style has created a generation of ‘spoiled brats.’”

In short a gentleman wrote in and basically asked Wil why parents these days go overboard when taking care of their children’s diabetes.  “Tired parents and Nighttime checks?  Phbtt!  Back in my day…that wasn’t needed!”  Ok.  That isn’t a direct quote.  But it’s the gist I got from it all.

I know a lot of you don’t do nighttime checks.  Different strokes for different folks.  It’s all good.  But let me take a minute to defend the D’rents of today.  Most of us are on top of our child’s care…exhaustingly so.

Why does it seem to be so much more exhausting to take care of a child with diabetes now than it did back in the good ol’ days?

Hmmm.  Could it possibly be that we KNOW more now than we did back in the good ol’ days?  Back then I didn’t wear a seatbelt.  Ever.  Back then my baby sister rode in a bassinette between the front two bucket seats in the van.  Back then chewing on cribs painted with lead was no biggy.  Bike helmets? Nope. Back then everyone smoked.  Back then 5 year olds walked downtown to buy candy at the corner store, by themselves.  (Guilty as charged.)

Now we have more in-for-ma-tion.

Yes, probably too much information.  But it’s staring me in the face every minute of every day nonetheless.  Am I to ignore it because, “They’ll probably be fine.”

Let’s start out with what I know. 

I know that a tighter A1C with smaller BG swings means less complications down the road for my children.

I know that when my kids sleep it is the ONLY time of the day that I have less than 10 variables to contend with.  During the day I have limited control over varibles such as exercise, food, stress, excitement and weather.  At night I have their control in the palm of my hand.  Why would I give up that advantage? 

At FFL I learned that if you check your sugar 4-6 times a day the probability of getting an A1C in the 8’s goes way up.  If you check 6-8 times a day the probability of an A1C in the 7’s is very high.  In fact this class contented that your “control” is mostly based on putting in the work.  I can't tell you if all that is true, but research suggests, the harder you try the better you'll do.  

As Reyna says HERE, that is 1/3 of my boys’ lives that I can have in check.  Since my children don’t snack after dinner unless they are low, I contend that is half of my boys’ lives that I can have in check.

Do you have any idea how positively that influences my boys' A1C’s?

Now let’s backtrack a little.  I don’t stay up at night for shiz and giggles.  I don’t pat myself on the back and act as though I’m a martyr for my boys.  The bags under my eyes aren’t badges of honor.

I check at night when it is needed.

You see with all this information comes responsibility.  If you had a child with Diabetes, and they went low every night, or high every night, wouldn’t you feel a responsibility to check on it and find a way to fix it?  We can check ketones with a blood meter now.  If my child has ketones, wouldn’t I work at night to get rid of them so they don’t feel completely crappy the next day?

Would you let a 279 fly at midnight right before you were off to bed?  Maybe you would.  But I wouldn’t, because I know fixing that 279 helps my son wake up with a good number…feeling his best.  Cognitively at his best, ready to tackle his day at school.  Which if you haven’t heard, is much harder than when we were kids.  (I took naps in 1st grade.  Seriously.  The whole class did.  My 1st graders had to write 12 page reports, with bibliographies, followed up by composed and thoughtful oral reports.)

Have I let a 279 fly before without correcting it?  Sure.  If they have been LOW LOW LOW all night and I finally see a safe number, you bet your SOBE water I’m going to keep them there.  Though it is rare, I realize there are always exceptions to the rule.

I know our family is weird, but we have three boys with T1.  There is RARELY a night when someone doesn’t need a correction, or needs to be fed.  RARELY.  And because I’ve been doing this for 15 years, I’ve caught a scary number of lows I would have never known about if I didn’t test.  Dead in Bed Syndrome.  I think all of us say,  “Hell no!”  Not that we all don’t know it could still happen to our family, but if it did, wouldn’t I want the peace of mind to say, “I tried?”

There are so many variables to my nighttime routine, I can’t write them here.  (Although Christina and Katy did good jobs trying to HERE and HERE.) Suffice it to say, I go by my gut.  A lot of nights a 12:00 check is enough…once in awhile every hour is hardly enough.  Did you know that children do most of their growing at night?  Did you know this active growing effects their blood sugars?  So I could go months with no worries about the nighttime, but then BAM!  Growth spurt and all their basal rates go out the window!  That means adjusting.  That means checking at night.  And by the way, it seems like one of my boys is always growing.

In this new age, we have CGM’s and blood sugar monitors that give us numbers in 3 seconds.  Why wouldn’t I use that technology to the best of my ability to make for a better future for my children?  I’m the one that has to look at them in the eye when they are 40 and say, “I did the best I could.”  Even in the event of them facing complications from this crappy disease.  And speaking of technology: If my boys pump sets ripped out at 10pm, and I didn’t check them until morning, they would be in DKA.  Period.

Am I stressing my kids out by taking such good care of them?


That is WHY I take good care of them, to take the stress off them.  In my situation, my boys were diagnosed as babies.  (I’m not exaggerating; my first was diagnosed at 8 months old.)  I do things like test their sugars before they wake up, so it doesn’t have to be the first thing they do in the morning.  I don’t make a big deal about diabetes.  It is what it is.  Maybe I’m different than other parents, but I think that “Spoiled brat” that Wil spoke about in the Diabetes Mine article is an exception to the rule.  Or maybe he’s just a TEENAGER?   I don’t know.

But I’ll tell you that by 6th grade my now 15-year-old son was changing his own pump sets and counting his own carbs.  My 11 year old has just begun counting his own carbs, and he’s already pretty awesome at it.  This year he will learn to change his sets too, he already rewinds the pump and takes the reservoir out when it’s time to change the set.  I pass on the responsibility little by little so it doesn’t seem so much as responsibility, but more like FREEDOM.  Power to go on sleepovers and power to go on a bike ride with a friend without mom ringing him on the cellphone.  (And yeah, my boys have cheap flip phones.  We have no school nurse…another thing that was available to us back in the good ol’ days.)

One day my boys will move away.  One day they’ll be ALL on their own.  On that day, I’ll wish I could help them a little bit longer, because that’s what mothers do.  They love and cherish and help.

Am I a tiger mom?

I honestly don’t think so.  In fact, I’m going to flat out say, “No, I’m not.”

I’m a mom doing the best she can, with the information she has.

Also, I have never, ever, in my life met a T1 child who was not mature, sweet, kind and all kinds of wonderful.  There are always a few bad seeds out there that ruin it for everyone else.  But generalizing is dangerous, and in this case, grossly unfair.

And that's all I have to say about that.


  1. Love this! Could you please share my blog?! Pleeaasee? c:
    It's about my life as a type one diabetic teenager and i'm nearly at 10,000 views!

  2. fabulous Meri! Certainly not a Tiger Mom - I've seen you encourage independence and learning via mistakes with all your boys. You give them the power then ask for and then you move outta the way so they can shine. Funny that you mentioned night time management plans - before I started sharing mine I thought it would be simple but it wasn't and I had to really think about how I think in the middle of the night. Then when it came to sharing Sugarboys I was like - there are just too many variables to share. I guess I looked at it as an opportunity to share how much thought goes into our night time decisions and I likely didn't do it justice. Katy was way more thorough and funny. Those other seeds you spoke of - Im not convinced that how a parent helps manage diabetes creates or even contributes to a sense of entitlement (spoiled). Maybe that is just a kids personality and the D management is the ends not the means. And who am I too judge any parents decision as long as they are trying to do right by their kids. Im glad we are all talking about this and while I didn't care for Will's post it got many of talking and sharing and maybe there is a Dmom or Ddad out there that needed to hear that its ok to check and not feel guilty for feeling the need to do it. Id hate for the parent of a newly diagnosed kiddo to only read Will's post - Will has lots of smart things to share in many of his posts but perhaps leave the D parenting to those of us doing it.

  3. As someone who grew up with T1 in the "good ole" days, I am one of those that never had a parent check my blood sugar.

    On my diagnosis day I was taught what my sugar was supposed to be, how to give my shots, how to test my sugar (guesstimate on a strip, add blood wait 2 mins, wipe, wait 2 mins) my mother is a nurse, so on day one I was giving my own needles and drawing up insulin with her supervision.

    We didn't have "rapid" acting insulin. We have long acting and regular. That's it.

    Our sugars were high sometimes but a "correction" was unheard of because the long acting dips were unpredictable...and yeah...I survived.

    I would NEVER call another person calls a child "spoiled" because his or her parents care so deeply for his or her health. I think all of the d-parents I know through online and offline on committees with me are brilliant parents.

    HOWEVER, as someone who has worked with T1 kids of all ages (7-18...and watched them grow) in the diabetes camp setting...I think the kids who were empowered to make decisions, and contribute to their care at home are much, much better off. The ones who help out, set their alarms at night, report sugars to mom or dad, the ones who wake up fully to help treat their lows if they can etc. Tend to be more conscientious about their diabetes as adults. I don't think the issue is as black and white as Wil pointed out. Even if I have seen the children he speaks of, I don't think it is in specific relation tot heir parents' treatment of their diabetes, it was their sense of entitlement which runs much deeper.

    As an adult with diabetes, I think the most important thing for D-parents to realize is that a lot of the fears they have can reflect on the children making the disease a lot scarier than living with it actually is day-to-day. I think you, Christina, Lea (come to mind immediately) all do very well in keeping your heads level, and recognizing the importance of separating your fears and not projecting them on the children.

    Nobody has the right to tell a parent how to raise their child. Ever. I think shaming parents for how they do things is even worse. But I will always be there to help D-parents who come to me for tips on what its like to live with diabetes during the different stages of childhood, and nudge them to giving their children more wiggle room with treatments.

    I think you're clearly doing an awesome job. Your kids are alive and as happy as they can be, and really that's all you can ask for. Keep doing your thang, mama!

    1. I agree. I also think that some kids are not empowered, because their parents aren't empowered.

      My 15 year old was diagnosed 15 years ago,(at 8 months old,) and we used Regular, NPH, Lente, and Ultralente...and another I can't remember the name of now. It was CRAZY! So I totally feel for you. But 15 years ago, because he was a baby, and insulin was even suckier than it is now, I was up all night checking him. His blood sugar goals, per his endo was between 200-300 for his first year. It was the only goal that would keep him safe.

      Man, have times changed!

  4. As a kid who was diagnosed in 1986 (at four years old), things WERE different back then. Our insulin wasn't as accurate. We didn't know about counting carbs, carb to insulin ratios, and in all honesty, I don't think we were expected to live a FULL healthy life. I went in to have my tonsils taken out eight months after I was diagnosed. I have SEEN these medical records. My 1 shot of NPH per day and a 12.6 A1c was "in control" enough to let them do surgery on me (remember, this was before all the fancy laser stuff).
    Things were different thing. But I'll tell you this: If I had a child diagnosed with T1 diabetes, I'd do middle of the night checks, my kid would have a cell phone, and I would probably be horrified if my child's school didn't have a full-time nurse.
    Like you said: Knowing more informations means being able to make better decisions for your child in hopes that they can live a long, healthy life FREE of as many complications as possible.
    Also, I will say I think there are probably parents out there who are TOO over-protective, but there is a generation of kids with helecopter parents out there and they don't all have diabetes. There are going to be a few in every group, if it's diabetes, or just a "regular" kid.
    I feel like I've written a blog post here.... Maybe I SHOULD write a blog post.

  5. You know I started reading the post that got you to write your post and then stopped! I don't care! I don't care what he says... I don't care what he thinks.... Tristan usually has a CGM and that's what we rely on at night... so we don't get up unless it alarms that there's a problem... however; last Sunday he decided to go swimming with his pump and DexCom...saved the pump... lost DexCom. So yes... we have set up our alarm to get up at 2am and check him. And you know what.... On Tuesday when I got up at 2am to check him he was at 52! What if I hadn't set an alarm... would he have woken up in the morning? Maybe... Maybe not... I gave him 3 tabs (which is a lot of him and would normally shot him in the 300s), he woke up at 118 in the morning which tells me that he was still going down when I caught it at 52... ya... I'm going to keep checking him in the middle of the night until we get another DexCom and honestly I don't care what anybody thinks about it. My son is safe and he wakes up in the morning. Like you said... my dark circles are not a patch of honor... they are what they are.. period. Tristan was diagnosed at 16 months... he's now 9.... I will give him full control when he shows me that he can handle it... Until then... I will continue to be his pancreas and allow him to have a childhood. PERIOD. Thanks for a great post Meri! :)

  6. Great as always, Meri. I think the man who wrote the offending blog (and it is offending) just used the wrong tone and language. I *think* what he was trying to say was what Alanna said so well above. (I think? Maybe I'm just a cockeyed optimist who always things people mean well ....) I also don't think he was alluding to parents like you or Christina or the many, many others who DO let their children LIVE their lives to the fullest despite diabetes (hey! That would be a good blog name). Since my daughter is an adult now, I have the gift of hindsight. Since she was raised in those days of Regular and Long acting too, we started out in a time when we "only" checked 4-6 times a day and yet ... there were plenty of nights we had to be up becuase of sickness, a weird # at bedtime, whatever. That's how I found my on line friends at CWD back then --- playing with dial up in the middle of the night ha! But ..... I do feel for newer parents to all this. You see, in my view, they've been given the gift of way way more information (CGM's, more frequent checks on meters that work fast etc) and really, no better tools do DO anything about it. Insulin still stinks .... it's a crude attempt at what a pancreas does. so these parents are terrified by what they see and stuck using a crude tool to try to fix what they see. I guess I was "lucky" because we learned to feel semi-confident in Lauren's body despite diabetes from a young age. She uses a CGM now so she knows she does go low at night .... but you know what? Based on her experiences over many many years of diabetes, she does not always panic about it ..... she knows for the most part what she needs to do and how her body will react. I just don't know how the littler kids today are ever going to be able to have that kind of confidence in their safety and in their bodies. And I PROMISE you, if Lauren was newly diagnosed now I'd be acting in EXACTLY the same way the newer to this parents are. I totally get it. I just wish for the sake of this next generation of kids with D we could find a way to help the kids and the parents live in "somewhat peace" with all this so they CAN go on and live in the world on their own and pursue their dreams. I think a LOT about this. I wish we could find an answer .... I don't think ANY kids are spoiled because their parents take care to the max ... I think they are loved and protected. But I also wonder if they are being ....what's the best word for it? .... held back? Please note I am NOT talking about little kids and I totally believe teens need parental support in this too. I'm talking about the situations where a child feels fear (and they do pick up on our fear) and is not allowed to take age appropriate forward steps because of diabetes. Did ANY of this make sense. I'm babbling .... so i hated the guy's tone; I don't like his wording at all. But I wonder if deep down he meant something else? PS A cure would fix all this.

    1. "way way more information (CGM's, more frequent checks on meters that work fast etc) and really, no better tools do DO anything about it. Insulin still stinks..." <---Never thought of it this way. This dichotomy---the intense information and crap tools---explains so much of the stress! Brilliant.

  7. I think Moria makes a valid and very important point: the mindset is different these days because of so much info and gadgets, and even the doctors teach us to over-react to numbers that go too high or low sometimes. It can be overwhelming - where parents freak out because of a 60 at night or a 200, when those who've been at this longer (and those back in the day of different insulins and less tech) know it's nothing to really panic about.

    What COULD that modern panicking lead to? Who knows. But I certainly have met teens with diabetes at D-Camp who don't know basics of their pump settings, how to figure out their basal or bolus rates, or how to manage without the D-tech. They respond with, "my parents do all that." And these aren't newbies, these are teens living with type 1 for many years. Of course, these also aren't the ones so connected in the online world or the more vocal areas of the D-Community.

    As Moira notes, and as I read Wil's response to the original question wondering about whether modern CWDs are in fact "over-parented," I do have to wonder whether to some degree we are teaching kids to panic more than we really need to? But as Moira points out, it's not really the parents but the modern age of D-Management that is leading to this. We have the tools, so why not use them?

    Obviously, we can't make blanket statements. Just as we can't say every kid manages well or the same way, it's not fair to cast a "spoiled" description on all CWDs. I don't think anyone has.

    If I were a D-parent myself, I'd probably do the same darn thing and proudly parent to the 1 millionth degree and beyond, for the well-being of my kid. That's the natural instinct.

    It can be an interesting thing to think about and ponder, as Moira does. But at the end of the day YDMV and so will the parenting style each family adopts. And I don't think anyone disputes that as the final answer and response, that it's about what works best for us and our family individually. In my opinion, that's exactly what Wil was writing in his column.

    1. I don’t know of any parents that “freak out” over a 60 or a 200. I think you are using facebook posts in parents group as litmus on how parents act at home. When I post in a group, “Up all night with ketones, checked every hour. Exhausted!” I never, EVER would say that to my kids. I never tell my kids that I’m exhausted or worried. I never mention to them how many times I’ve checked them while they were sleeping, although they know I keep an eye on them at night. But I do need an outlet, and those groups are it. I had an entire day where L had large ketones a few months ago. I couldn’t get them down. HE was throwing up. We were minutes away from emergency. I smiled, and told him we’d fix it one way or another, and then hours later when he was asleep bawled on the phone to a friend because of the exhaustion.

      Judging the parent population as a whole isn’t right.

      Now, are there parents out there that project their fears onto children? ABSO-FREAKING-LUTELY! But, these parents are wired that way. It isn’t just because of diabetes. I know personally a lot of parents that fear everything, and think their children are dying from one thing or another all the time, and diabetes isn’t a factor in their family. When you have a mother that fears and worries constantly and then add diabetes to the mix? They struggle. That is for sure.

      And come on. Children who don’t know how to change their pump settings? Kids these days can learn that in minutes. Changing pump settings is a no brainer. The problem really lies with the endos who don’t even let the parents change the pump settings! THAT is the travesty here. Parents are as good as their endo, and if the endo doesn’t give the parent freedom to make changes, how do the children even have a fighting chance?

      Also, being connected to the online world puts us at an advantage that I would say 95% of the T1 population doesn’t have. We have information, and knowledge that all this crazy is par for the course. Most families do not. That is why they go to camp, to learn the things that other people learn online. They only know what their endo teaches them, and allows them to do. They are doing the best they can, and I think instead of criticizing their best, we should find ways to reach out to them and show them that they are normal…that 60’s and 200’s at bedtime can be normal. If a person is cut off from the online world and they are getting chastised by their endo for numbers they have limited control over, yeah, they’re going to be a mess. They are going to fear they are failing their child. Is there anything worse?

      That’s what I’m seeing out there anyway.

    2. Planned on thanking you for your original post, but this reply? Totally wins the day. Yes, yes yes. The D-Blogs and the forums we participate in serve as our mental health Rx. We need a place to go vent, to support other D'rents, and for fellowship.

      It feels as if this issues is viewed through two completely different paradigms. Outside looking in folks perceive night testing and tight control of D as overkill or micro management, worry about freak out moments, and possibly creating learned helplessness in our kids. Those of us getting up for the night tests, corrections etc have a super hard time understanding what all the fuss is about. We are NOT freaking out, we are not creating a sense of panic or state of fear in our children, we're managing glucose numbers with the information we have before us. As for the learned helplessness, I'll admit that's a societal problem, one I see often in public education, but I'd hazard a guess that our D kids aren't typically the kids faced with this challenge. (Not to say it never happens, but blanket statements about D kids in general? No way, no how!)

      There's a big difference between freaking out over a 60 and knowing it's smart to catch and treat at 60 when your tends to plummet straight on til 30 without ever feeling it. Same for the 200. My D girl feels anything upwards of 180 because of what those highs do to her physically. She tests and corrects all on her own during the day, I take on the nights. Our one rule about insulin is that she always shares her thinking. What are you giving, why? Did you verify BG, and what do you have IOB? I know people (my family) read that as overkill, but my nursing brain asks this. If insulin is such a dangerous medication by virtue of the very narrow window between not enough, just right, and too much that we force nurse to verify the dose with at least one other nurse, isn't it prudent to ask our D kids to practice safe administration? It takes all of 2 seconds for my girl to ask , 'that looks like 7u, right?' I don't let my 15 yo take advil without letting me know why and how much either...

      Like you, I don't let slip how many times I've checked or say to her the things I might post online in frustration. The whole point of this is to encourage her to live life knowledgeable about D, building a healthy management routine, and achieving a sense of balance where D is just another part of life. Everything I do is part of my effort to gradually let her take on care as she matures, and ensure she never feels she's on her own with this.

      Yesterday, she spent the entire day at an amusement park with friends she met at camp. I didn't go, but we had times for her to check in via text. She also knew she could call if she wanted to talk over her SWAG for park food. Between facebook and my chatter box, I've learned that the three girls have vastly different approaches to D care. They supported each other, compared notes, took care of themselves, worked out SWAGs as a team, and had a fantastic time. I'd say we're not over parenting so much as providing positive role models and opportunities for practice that increase in complexity and responsibility over time.

  8. I think you've hit the nail on the head (once again) Meri - when we know better, we do better. And as we see research that supports more intensive management resulting in fewer complications and longer lifespans for us T1s, it's hard to argue for a less-intense management strategy.

    Do what works, and feels right, for your family - bottom line.

  9. Meri, hope you didn't mind me posting on facebook about my blog post on Suite D about Jake. Again, being diagnosed at age fifteen, he really owned the disease. I have such an appreciation for what you and other D moms must go through. I think you all are doing a fantastic job!

  10. Amen Meri, thank you!!! We do the best we can with t he in information we have at that time. Yes, my type 1will have a lifetime to manage, so for me this is my litttle "you sleep, still be a kid, grow, learn & thrive" while I've got your back at night!!!!

  11. damn skippy!

    well said, as always!

    you rock!!!

  12. Yes, diabetes used to be easier. I blogged about that myself awhile ago. But that doesn't mean it was better. Our urine glucose tests of old only alerted to highs, not lows (ketones without glucose in urine meant a low). But the "range" was crude. Control was crude, too. If I ran in the 200 mg/dl range all day and suddenly dropped by 100, I'd land safely at 100 mg/dl. But these days, when kids may run an average of 150, a 100-point drop could mean something worse.

    So these days, there are three things necessitating the midnight tests: tighter control, better measurements, and something I hadn't mentioned -- the way the world has become more connected, and parents learn from each other's experiences.

    1. "Easier but not better" sums it up really nicely! All of us learn to manage information overload in our lives, now - no different in the T1D arena, just much higher stakes.

  13. I think its a bit premature to "ass"ume how today's CWD's will turn out... they haven't even grown up yet. Who knows if my "parenting skills" will cause him to have "bad self-managment", was there a study done on his future self??

    AND, I think my role, my purpose, my identity changed the day I had my kids... not the day d came into our life.

    Well written, Meri, as always. And GREAT response in the comments.

  14. I know I'm late to respond, but I couldn't just let this one go. I have Type 1 Diabetes and so does my daughter. Here's a little secret for some of the people who responded above, who clearly don't have children, having kids changes everything. Everything. I was diagnosed with diabetes in "the good old days." My A1C's were horrible despite the very best efforts of my parents. They did everything they could to manage diabetes. My mother worried about complications, worried if I was breathing when she came from working midnights, worried what my future would hold. Also, she worried about all of the normal things too. That's what good parents do - do the best they can, give everything they can, and hope for the best. So from a parenting perspective, the "good old days" weren't so golden either. I didn't understand, in an intuitive way, my parents sacrifice and worry until my daughter was diagnosed. When my daughter was diagnosed, it was a complete game changer. I am doing everything in my reach to help my daughter. I worry about all of the same things. I want her to have the best future possible. I have better gadgets - faster insulin, pumps, cgm's - but they don't guarantee anything. They are tools I use, hopefully, to ensure she is alive and with as few complications as possible in the future. Turns out, the "good old days" are still around. I'm going out on a limb, but I'm half there anyway, parents who don't do night checks are failing their children. I judge you like I judge parents who have nice clothes and a cell phone but have children without winter coats on when it's snowing. You have the tools, but you aren't using them. I'm not perfect. I like sleep and so does my spouse. We don't catch every number and we don't freak out at 60 or 200. We don't check her every 15 minutes. We do check at night and even that is not a guarantee that she will wake alive every morning. Do you get that? I'm talking about my daughter and her life. Also, some people who work at camps should be a little less judgmental of the kids they work with. If you don't want to help the kids who you feel are sheltered with a sense of entitlement but instead only champion the kids who are self reliant and require little assistance, well then you have some growing to do. I commend the time you spend at camps, but I don't need your advice on how to help my child or how to help me be less hovering. We're doing just fine. I truly hope that all children are happy and healthy but I wonder how your perspective would change if your own child was diagnosed.. I'm not going to justify my actions (which was my instinct) about advocating, supporting, and embracing my child. She's mine and my responsibility. If you want to suggest parents are wrong for worrying, advocating, hovering, and doing nightly checks, then I don't want to be right.

  15. Bravo Meri! I couldn't agree more. Isaac's endo asked why we were still doing night checks...I pointed right at the computer screen where she downloaded his pump at a 50 that was in the middle of the night and said, "even with the CGM lows and highs happen!" We truly have to do what we feel is best for our kids and the new information helps us make better decisions. Thanks for this post.

  16. My boys are 8, almost 9, and like you, I check in the night...and many times I've caught an unexplained low that would have gone unnoticed or possibly resulted in Dead in Bed. How would we feel then? Explain over the coffin, "Well, I needed to sleep, too!"? Not so much. And, like you, I gradually give them more responsibility to foster their independence because ultimately it's their disease, not mine. My job is to keep them healthy and safe, and to minimize the onset or likelihood of complications. Call me a Tiger Mom if you'd like, and Hear me ROAR!


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