Michael Hoskins writes The Diabetic's Corner Booth. And it is always just like that with him. His writing, and his comments on my blog and others oozes the comfort of a caring friend...a friend that you are sitting having a casual lunch with in the corner booth of a diner.
This post below is no different. Little things make a big difference. Michael's wife and mother inspire me! Thank you Michael for taking the time to write such a heartfelt post!
A Note In My Lunch
Each day, little handwritten notes grace my lunch bag.
My D-Wife calculates the carb counts for the lunches packed, even on days when I've made my own meal by just sticking a PB cracker pack, apple sauce, and chip bag into a plastic grocery bag. Even though I could add up the carb counts listed on each package and tally up the total to bolus for, she takes the time and effort to write the note.
In only a few lines, each note represents a world of support.
The same thing happens when we eat at home, as she calculates the total using the white board on the fridge. There, the list entails whatever happens to be gracing our plates and she lets me know what the food "costs" to key into my pump.
I'm really not sure when this became "our life" and how things work, but it must feels at home. We're both in our early 30s and haven't yet started out family, but that type of support can bring a smile to the face sometimes and just helps you know how good you have it.
Once, my own D-Mom (living with Type 1 herself since age five) did that very task. Life was different way back then. I was diagnosed at five just before I began school, and blood meters weren't the norm. They were about the size of a brick, actually. But because of my mom's longtime stretch and her mom's own push to have the latest and greatest gadgets and technology, we had a meter in our home not long after they came out. That trend continued into the early 90s when meters became more common, and I've had one as long as I can remember.
While I don't now recall any of the specific tricks of the trade my mom used back in those days, since we didn't really have "carb counting" or MDI as it exists now. It may have just been the meal exchanges or insulin-dosage timing, but I'm sure it was just as love and support-saturated as the notes my D-Wife uses now.
Somehow, one day, after all the rebellion in those teen years and early 20s, I found myself with someone new to bring that balance into my life. Someone who understood what was needed, was willing to help me calculate, and be there every step of the way.
By the time we'd met and started dating in that final year of college, I'd already transitioned to my own D-Management. Not even sure I remember how diabetes first came up, but it was pretty much always a factor and we talked about it and moved on. Just did what was needed. From those early days when I'd just started pumping during my last year of college in 2001, to now.
Only much later would I be able to get a glimpse into what my mom and dad had done, and gone through, in helping me become the person that I'd eventually become in order to find that Loving and Supporting Spouse who would take that D-Life onto her own shoulders. They did the same thing way back when in the 80s and 90s, but I never really knew or appreciated it - until the Diabetes Online Community gave me the chance.
Discovering the D-Parents who are a crew of superheroes, who are a community within a community, was just as much a game changer that bridged the gaps in my own D-Life. People like Meri and others who are always there, and who you know just "get it" when others don't. I've been blessed to find this community, as it's opened my eyes to a world that "gets it" in ways that I previously couldn't even begin to understand.
But even though we live in a time now where everyone is connected online and there is a constant flow of support, sometimes it just comes down to notes in a lunch sack or scribbled numbers on a whiteboard.
Maybe the means have changed from meal exchange rates and balancing long-acting with short-acting at meal times, to carb counting with an insulin pump filled with pretty quick-acting insulin. Maybe we're more plugged into what the numbers mean and how the food will react.
The sentiment doesn't change. The love and support is what sometimes means the very most. And it's that kind of sentiment that binds so many of us in this community together. Because we all have those moments, those notes, and that love and support in our D-Lives.
And that kind of thing is what shapes us into the people we are, and the people we'll become.
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Sounds like you're surrounded by great people, Mike! This was a great, heartfelt post.
ReplyDeleteWhat a great post! As a D Mama of a son, I am hopeful he will find a D wife like yours! She is pretty amazing sounding. :)
ReplyDeleteI am with Tracy on this one, your post gives me hope that one day my son will find someone as special as your wife to love him and care as much about him as she does you!!! Moms of boys are going to be critical of who their sons marry, but I am going to have an eagle eye out for the "one" for Cale, someone just like your "one"!
ReplyDeleteMy son was just diagnosed seven months ago...never in my life have I considered his friends and future wife more than now. I grew up with a T1 sister and saw first hand what a partner with no interest and support can do.
ReplyDeleteYou are truly fortunate to have such pure love in your life.
I worry about Justin's future all the time. I hope and pray that he is blessed enough to find someone like you have. If not... I guess I'll have to go all "crazy mama" on her :)
ReplyDeleteGreat post ")
How have I missed that your mom has Type 1? Wow...sounds like she was on it and now your wife is. That is a new and emerging area that I have been learning about ... the spouses. I am glad to see that they get involved and help by providing support and some shoulder to help bear the weight.
ReplyDeleteGreat post. You did Meri proud fo' sho'!
I'm totally crying here... MIKE AND MERI! I want to give a big shout out to the awesome D wife here... YOU GO MAMA! It's my hope, my wish, that Sweets find friends and a spouse that will support her in this way. Someone who will share this burden with her. Someone who will help carry the load. I can't carry it forever. Even though I would... She will have to move on to this adulthood.... and it scares the living daylights out of me. Great post, Mike! Great wife! Great Mom!
ReplyDeleteIt always warms my heart to hear stories of supportive spouses.
ReplyDeleteLove that she writes you those notes...just love it!
Looking forward to reading your blog!
Beautiful post MIke! I have tears just flowing down my cheeks. I pray that God will bless my son with a wonderful caring wife as you have been blessed with. A strong support network is priceless!!!
ReplyDeleteWhat a fantastic post!
ReplyDeleteI love the notes she writes :) This completely warms my heart. God bless your wonderful bride!
It is my prayer that my daughter will find a husband who honors her in the way that you honor your wife.
It is my prayer that she will find a husband who supports her with as much love and compassion as your wife.
What an awesome couple the two of you are!
I really liked your blog! It helped me a lot…
ReplyDeleteYou said it correctly. I was checking continuously this blog and I am impressed! Very helpful information specifically the last part :) I care for such info a lot. Thank you.
ReplyDeleteMany thanks for the amazing article.
ReplyDeleteIt’s the best time to make some plans for the future and it’s time to be happy. I have read this post and if I could I wish to suggest you some interesting things or tips. Perhaps you can write next articles referring to this article. I desire to read even more things about it!
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ReplyDeleteThanks for posting..My son was diagnosed 12-27-2010. I pray he finds a great supportive wife also.
ReplyDelete:)
We have talked about this before Michael.your wife rocks!!! I'm so happy you have such am amazing support system at home.i pray Justice has the same.
ReplyDeleteIt always warms my heart to hear stories of supportive spouses.
ReplyDeleteLove that she writes you those notes...just love it!
Looking forward to reading your blog!