"Maybe this time it will bring a different result!" We say enthusiastically to ourselves as we bolus our child for the impossible meal in front of them.
And we fail. Not all the time, but dang if it doesn't FEEL like all the time.
Man, we are SO SO hard on ourselves. We don't take our full time pancreas gig lightly, that is for sure...
Where do we find the energy to keep trying? We are like The Little Engine That Could! We think we can! We think we can! We think we can! All this "think we can" stuff is mentally exhausting! Just once I'd like to say..."I know I can't." But, when it comes to our children, we all know that just isn't an option.
So we dig down deep in the recesses of our soul and we find that energy! We pull that "I think I can" mentality straight out of our gut. Constantly working for a better result. How do we recover from the last bang on the wall...and then find the energy to bang our head again? I'll tell you how. All our "I think I can,"...it comes from HOPE!
Every time we bolus...every time we change a basal rate...every time we SWAG a cupcake or a Chinese food buffet plate stacked higher than the Eiffel Tower...EVERY TIME...we cling to hope that we are gonna get this one right!
Dang if we aren't going to move that rubber tree plant!! We are like the mighty ant in Frank Sinatra's song. Diabetes is a huge giant of an obstacle. Logic says we can't win. But we spit on our hands and we pull up our big girl/big boy underwear and try anyway.
High hopes. We will keep going, because each and every time we HOPE with all our heart that we got it right this time.
This one if for you my friends!
i needed that. last night hubby didn't bolus for milk like I asked (she was a 160 and he was afraid she was going down). So there I am at 3:45 a.m. try to correct a 225 which wouldn't have been 225 if the milk had been bolused!!!!! I was spitting mad this morning.
ReplyDeleteMeri!!! I needed this today too. As Joe is recovering from the Vomit Bug...I am guessing at every turn. Some times I get it right, many I don't. Not trying, not hoping, IS.NOT.AN.OPTION. We have to teach our children to try...to have HOPE.
ReplyDeleteMeri,
ReplyDeleteYou have no idea how much I appreciate and am encouraged by your blog. It makes me laugh, makes me cry and at my age almost makes me wet myself(TMI I know). But I agree with the hope that we all have as diabetic parents. We have to keep pushing on and saying we can. Thanks for all your words of wisdom. Thanks for sharing your trials and successes with us. I for one can't thank you enough for making this journey a little more tolerable with you in the wings.
Love from Iowa
Kathy Groenbeck
ahhh...good ol' blue eyes! Beautiful, simply beautiful.
ReplyDeleteWe CAN do it Meri!!!! I just know it :)
ReplyDelete"Dang if we aren't going to move that rubber tree plant!!" You are SO right! :)
ReplyDeleteGotta have hope!! (This song is proof that you've been listening to that Sinatra station on XM Radio:)
ReplyDeleteThanks Meri!! You are wonderful! I heart you! Sorry I've been so MIA. Rough couple months around here. I need to catch up on all my fav bloggers lives. I've finally done some updates too. :)
ReplyDeleteWe keep pushing and going because we know there are better days ahead. Right? RIGHT??
ReplyDeleteForever "hoping that we got this one right". We can't be wrong all the time right?
ReplyDeleteThanks Meri....well said, and definitely shared!
ReplyDelete