This just in…Aliens hate us!

What the heck!? What is happening to this world?

NO…What HAS happened to this world?

I often wonder what would happen if an alien spaceship landed on earth to observe the culture of the human race. Would they be fascinated or just utterly disgusted?

I’m pretty sure the expression on their faces would be remarkably similar to the horror struck look I had while I was watching the MTV music awards last night. (Hello, Kanye West catastrophe!)

I am also convinced that they would have echoed my, ”Oh no she didn’t!”, while watching Serena Williams threaten to shove the tennis ball down the line judges throat in the US Open yesterday. And moreover, I am most certain they would think tennis is a sport only for those with God Complex’s if they watched John Federer, hours ago, swearing to the judge that he won’t shut up and will ask a F-ing question whenever he wants to.

Why the anger people?

While driving today, I came to a four way stop, twice. Both times someone went before it was their turn. BOTH times they looked angry…muttering quiet annoyances out of the side of their mouths, hunched over, as if channeling Lemony Snicket.


The last straw was the mail man FLINGING our three packages of test strips onto the porch. I ran out and said thank you…he grunted. He didn’t look back! He didn’t even respond! Okay, I do concede that we have a history. He gave me a disheveled, ripped, almost unrecognizable package at Christmas that was filled with postage stickers. (Not the Nintendo game that I had ordered.) So yes, I hunted him down and asked him as nicely as possible to tell me what he was thinking, giving that package to me. It could have been a bomb…Well it could have! Two weeks later he didn’t take my letters out of my mailbox. The flag was up. He just shoved in my new mail and walked away. I had to hunt him down again. (I fully acknowledge that I was probably very rude to this man, will the madness ever end?!) To be fair, that is probably why he doesn’t talk to me. But rude is rude. And there was just too much of it the last 24 hours!

I am going to go out on a limb and declare that Aliens would hate us! But unfortunately, they probably wouldn’t get much of a chance to show us their disdain. We would surely shoot them down before they ever got a chance to show us their lighted fingers and ask us to phone home. We’re totally rude that way.